Ndimadana ana awo. Kodi kukhala ndi moyo ndi chochita?

Ife tinkakonda kuyenda mu moyo wawo pa malonda zokongola. Banja losangalala, makolo achikondi, ankasewera koma ana omvera. Wodwala mayi modekha kufotokozera ana aamuna ndi aakazi khalidwe lake. Ndipo, zikuoneka, ganizo "ine ndimadana ndi ana awo," iye sankakhoza ngakhale kuti maganizo "makolo lenileni." Ndipo mfundo imeneyi ndi maganizo enieni, tidzakhala aithamangitse iwo otsiriza, popanda kuvomereza mpaka okha. "Ine ndimadana ndi ana awo - zina amaganiza mkazi wosimidwa -.? Ndi zoona, palibe nyama kuti asawononge, ndi ana nthawi zonse amuteteze Kodi ine ndikumverera ngati ine ndikuganiza choncho, ndiye ndine paliponse palibe wabwino monga mayi". taboo okhwima - ndi onse lotseguka wathu ndi ufulu monga izo - akadali superimposed pa chifaniziro cha m'banja. Komabe, zamaganizo kuti: palibe mayi amene kamodzi sanaone maganizo amenewa kwa mwana wake.

N'chifukwa chiyani zimenezi ndi kaya ndi zothetsera izi? Tiyeni tiyambe ndi choona kuti maganizo a anthu pa "mayi weniweni" amafuna nsembe zonse. Akukhulupirira kuti ayenera osati zofunika zonse ndi zokhumba za mwana wake, koma pa nthawi yomweyo kutumikira banja, ntchito, kuyang'ana zabwino ndi kukhala okondwa. Mayi nthawi zambiri iye mokwanira, kukhala nkhawa lomwa ndi udindo atatopa thupi. Ndipo komabe pa khwerero liri ndi mavuto ndi maphunziro: Agogo "mosamala" akusonyeza kuti iye alibe, anansi, ndi ogwira nawo ndi ana anu safuna kuti "woyenera" maganizo ake pa momwe ziyenera kukhala. Ganizo chabwera kwa mayi ndi Mtsikana wotere ake - ". Ndimadana ana awo" Ndipotu, nthawi zambiri choncho ndithu osiyana. Izo si chidani, ngati ife tisanthule tanthauzo la pafupi. Mayi sakufuna kuvulaza ana awo. Koma pa nthawi makamaka zikuoneka kuti ngati "mbisoweka" kapena chinacho - akanati chamunthuyo kapena ndiyakuti ndi mavuto ake. Iye anali kugona, kuchita zimene iye akufuna kumasuka, kukhala ndi anzake. Ine ndikhoza kugula okha osati konse udzafunidwa mwana amene "akhoza samapeza."

Ngati inu kudzacheza zambiri ndinaganiza, "ine ndimadana ndi mwana wanu" zoyenera kuchita, amene kutembenukira kwa? Choyamba kukhadzikika. maganizo anu chisokonezo. Ndi anachita wanu ndi nkhawa. Ngati mukufuna thandizo ndi kuyankha funso la chifukwa makolo kudana ana awo, ndiye si chifukwa chenicheni cha zotengeka zanu. chakuti ali mongoyesa kuti tithane ndi vutolo, mumasonyeza kuti inu mukumkondadi mwana wanu. Pakuti chidani mumalola kuyabwa, kutopa, mkwiyo wawo, kukhumudwa, timafuna pogwira. Ndipo chifukwa choona ayenera kuyang'ana pa okha. Kodi zofuna zanu si ikuyenda bwanji? Zokonda zomwe zimakupangitsani inu Umafuna kwambiri kwa inu? N'chifukwa chiyani muyenera kukhala "mayi wabwino"? Kaso iwe anansi ndi mabwenzi kapena ana womasuka ndi otetezedwa? Nthawi zambiri kungoganiza kudana mbewu - ndi kwenikweni kunyansidwa ndi kunyoza ndekha, kusadzidalira, zomwe cholinga makolo kuti sangathe kulimbana ndi maudindo awo.

Usachite mantha kuti afotokoze maganizo awo ndi ana. Nthawi zambiri, makolo amalakwitsa yaikulu mwa kuvomera mtima woona. Ndipo mwanayo ali ndi vuto: akuona kuti mayi kapena bambo ali okwiya, sakumvetsa, akuona kuti Subconsciously. Koma ngati iwo salankhula mwachindunji za khalidwe iwo samakonda zimene wokwiya, koma kwa kudziona ndi kulakwa kwa maganizo oipa, kuyesera "awombole" kukoma mtima kwake chilengedwe mphatso, ana kuphunzira zimene maganizo enieni ayenera kubisika kuti kudzipereka sikuloledwa. Pamene yimitsira zonse ndi M'MALO maganizo awo kumabweretsa umenewu neurotic. Ndithudi, izo si za kuwataya olusa pa nthawi iliyonse, ndi kufuula kuti aliyense: "Ndimadana ana awo, chifukwa iwo ali ..." Koma kunena kuti mosapita m'mbali kuti: "Ine ndine anakwiya chifukwa ine sindimakonda zakuti-n-wakuti, ine mukachita kutero ndi ", - bwino ndi athanzi kwa ubale wa banja kuposa kusaona mtima ndi yimitsira wa maganizo mwa njira iliyonse.