Malamulo a Ellen Fein ndi Sherry Schneider: "Momwe mungakwatire ndi mwamuna wa maloto anu"

Zitha kutsimikiziridwa kuti funso la kukwatirana ndi mwamuna wa maloto ake, limazunza ambiri mwa akazi. Zilibe kanthu kuti masiku ano anthu ambiri akugwirizana bwanji, kukanidwa kwa misonkhano ndi ukwati wawo. Chilichonse chomwe chinali, ukwatiwo umakumbukira kuopsa kwa zolinga za onse awiri komanso kukhala ndi moyo wodalirika.

Malamulo a chiyanjano: kusadziŵa sikumasuka ku zotsatira

Kupititsa patsogolo kwakukulu, kuwunikira moyo wathu lerolino, chinali chikhalidwe chenicheni cha ubale waukwati. Ndipotu, panopa palibe chigamulo cha makolo, komanso chikhalidwe cha dziko, ngakhale kutenga mimba sichidzatsogolera ku ukwatiwo. Pachifukwa ichi, chilakolako cha munthu chogwirizanitsa chiwonongeko chake ndi mkazi wake wokondedwa ndiwopindulitsa kwambiri.

Komabe, ufulu uwu, monga zinthu zambiri zokongola, uli ndi mbali yotsutsana. Atsikana ambiri amasokonezeka maganizo, ataya makhalidwe awo mwachikhalidwe komanso samatha kudalira malangizo ndi chitsogozo cha amayi a m'mbuyomo. Zikuwoneka kuti chirichonse chakhala chosavuta, koma sichoncho: zonse zasintha. Malamulo a masewerawo mu chiyanjano asintha, ndipo akuyenera kudziwa kuti apambane, komanso kuti asawonongeke pamsewu wa umoyo.

Wina angatsutsane ndi chiganizo chakuti njira yachilengedwe ya chitukuko pakati pa abambo ndi amai iyenera kusinthidwa, koma izi sizondomeko zokondweretsa. Pano pali kuyanjana kwa nthawi yayitali, ndilo liwu lomwe limatanthauzira kuti ndilokwatirana.

Kuti amvetse chikhalidwe cha zikhumbo zawo ndi mfundo za psychology yamwamuna, atsikana ndi amayi akusowa thandizo la alangizi odziwa bwino ntchito. Kwa zaka zoposa 20, Ellen Fein ndi Sherry Schneider, omwe adalemba buku lotchuka la "Malamulo." Momwe mungakwatire ndi mwamuna wa maloto anu. "

Kwa malamulo omwe alipo

Choyamba, bukuli ndi loyenera kuwerengera atsikana omwe akufuna kukhala ndi banja. Malingana ndi olemba okha, malamulo awo akuthandizira kumanga mgwirizano wa nthawi yaitali, wokhutira komanso wolimba. Ngati msungwana akukayikira za zolinga zake kapena amasankha njira yochepetsera maubwenzi ndi abambo, safunikira kutsatira zotsatirazi.

Malamulo a Ellen Fein adakhazikitsidwa patatha zaka zambiri zophunzira ndi kusanthula miyoyo ya amayi ambiri. Malingana ndi zomwe analandira panthawi yafukufuku, wolembayo anapanga zinthu 35, zomwe mwachidule zimapanga malangizo a khalidwe kwa atsikana.

Kuchita bwino

Ngakhale kuti bukuli linalembedwa ndi kufalitsidwa mu 1995, kufunika kwake sikulephereka. Komanso, malamulo a Ellen Fein amayang'aniridwa ndi amayi ambiri omwe amawerenga ntchito yake. Zotsatira zonena kuti malamulowa amagwira ntchito.

Bukhuli lamasuliridwa m'zinenero zachilendo ndipo latsutsa zolemba zambiri. Pafupifupi mabuku onse akuluakulu a ku America alemba ndemanga za izo, ndipo olemba amakhala akuitanidwa nthawi zonse monga alendo ku ma TV osiyanasiyana.

Kumvetsetsa mfundo ndi mgwirizano pakati pa abambo ndi amai, olembawo adathandiza anthu otchuka monga Oprah Winfrey, Beyonce, Blake Lovely, Kate Middleton ndi ena. Nthawi zambiri mu studio ya Oprah muli ndemanga kuchokera m'buku ndi malamulo a Ellen Fein.

Sherry Schneider ndi bwenzi lake akhala akuitanidwa mobwerezabwereza kwa wotchuka wotchuka wa TV.

Chofunika kwambiri cha malangizidwe

Ngati mukuyesera kupondereza tanthauzo la buku lonse m'mawu amodzi, zingamveke monga malangizo kwa kugonana kwabwino: "Musataye mutu wanu, pezani mphamvu zanu ndikuwonekera kwa munthuyo." Pachifukwa ichi, udindo wapadera ndi wa kuyitana kuti asagonjere zofooka za munthu komanso kuti asasinthe munthu kukhala bwenzi la mtsikana. Malamulo a Ellen Fein amachokera pazimene amuna amphamvu (pambuyo pake, awa ndiwo amuna abwino) ndi osaka mwachilengedwe. Kugonjetsa kuli m'magazi awo, ndipo iwo alibe chidwi ndi nyama zomwe zimabwera asanayambe kuzifufuza.

Aliyense ali ndi udindo wake

Bukhu la "Malamulo. Momwe mungakwatire ndi mwamuna wa maloto anu "amathandiza amayi kuti akhale" olandiridwa "komanso kukonza bwino" kusaka ". Pambuyo pake, amuna oyenerera amadzipangira wokhawokha omwe ali abwino kwambiri kuchokera kumalo awo ndipo amayesetsa kuti aziwakonda. Njira yogonjetsera ndi kuthana ndi zopinga kwa amuna ndi yofunikira kwambiri, chifukwa imapereka cholinga choyambirira, mtengo ndi mtengo. Azimayi, omwe ndi achilendo ku filosofi yotereyi, amawopseza amuna omwe angakhale nawo mwachindunji mwa kusalongosola zomwe zimagonjetsedwa pochita mgwirizano kapena kuyeserera kwa osankhidwa awo. Bukhu lakuti "Malamulo" limawulula izi ndi zolakwika zina zofanana za psychology ya amayi ndipo zimapereka ndondomeko zenizeni za kupeŵa kwawo.

Mitundu ndi malamulo okhwima

Owerenga ena amadandaula kuti malamulowo ndi ovuta kwambiri, ndipo kumamatira kwa iwo ndi kovuta kwambiri. Yankho likhoza kukhala bungwe kuti liganizirenso zofunikira ndikupeza zolimbikitsa. Ndipotu, malamulo a Ellen Fein amalembedwa kwa omwe ali pachibwenzi. Izi sizikutanthauza zaka zingapo zogwirizanitsa pa malo omwe anthu amakhala.

Pano pali funso la mgwirizano kwazaka zambiri. Kulongosola! Kugwirizana kwathunthu: kulemekezana, kugwirizanitsa, chitukuko chachuma, moyo wogonana wogwirizana, kubadwa ndi kulera ana komanso kusungirana chidwi pakati pa mtsogolo. Izi ndi ntchito yovuta, chifukwa kugwetsa manja ndi kuyenda ndi kosavuta, ndipo zotsatira zomvetsa chisoni za khalidwe lotere zimadziwika bwino kwa ambiri.

Momwe mungapangire chithunzi cha mkazi wokondweretsa

Bukhu la "Malamulo" silikutanthauza kunama ndikuyesera kudziyesa ngati munthu wina, amalimbikitsa kuti mudziwe nokha, kupeza ndi kulemekeza ulemu wanu. Lingaliro lalikulu ndikutetezera mavuto ena, kusokonezeka pakati pa mwamuna ndi mkazi. Malangizowo ambiri amadzipereka momwe angasungire mtunda woyenera. Mwachitsanzo, ulamuliro 3 makamaka umakuphunzitsani kuti musawononge khama pa munthu yemwe alibe chidwi. Koma izi ndizo zolakwika zofala kwambiri za akazi.

Zina mwa zinthu (kufotokozera mozama za ulaliki, kusangalala komanso kusamala). Malangizo ofunikira kwambiri ndi ovuta kulankhulana osati kukhala ovuta kwa amuna. Chigamulo 3 ndi zina, zopezeka m'bukuli, pemphani amayi omwe achotsedwa pamsampha kuti afotokoze mavuto awo.

Olemba amapereka malire oyankhulana kudzera foni mpaka kukambirana kwa mphindi khumi, ndi chiwerengero cha misonkhano - itatu pa sabata.

Zonsezi zovuta pakuyang'aniridwa koyambirira zimapangidwira kupanga chithunzi cha chidwi, chogwira ntchito, chophunzitsidwa, nthawi zonse chokhala ndi zochitika ndi zofuna akazi. Malingana ndi olemba, izi ndizo kuti amuna opambana amafuna kuwona akazi awo .

Kodi pali moyo pambuyo pa ukwatiwo?

Kugwiritsa ntchito kutchuka kwakukulu komanso kulandira makalata ambiri, Ellen ndi Sherry adatha kufufuza nkhani zambiri zenizeni. Pazifukwa zawo zinalembedwa buku lachiwiri lotchedwa "Malamulo a mkazi wanzeru."

Olemba anazindikira kuti owerenga awo, omwe anagwiritsa ntchito njira ndi malamulo omwe anafotokozedwa kale, adatha kukwatirana kapena kukwatira. Komabe, pa gawo ili la mafunso, mochulukirapo. Mmene mungakhalire ndi mkwati ndi mwamuna? Kodi n'zotheka kupumula ndikuletsa kukhazikitsa malamulo okhwima? Kodi mungapange bwanji zolakwa osati kusokoneza zomwe zamangidwa kale?

Zinthu izi zikupezeka m'buku latsopano. Zapangidwira akazi achichepere ndipo cholinga chake ndi kusunga chidwi cha umunthu wa mkazi pansi pa kusintha.